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I earnestly pray for humility but question no further. That’s my amorphous belief. After attending church awhile, a priest asked why I never go to confession. I told him I have a special confessor. He assumed one at a different parish. I no longer need to confess except to myself. I made my final penance. While usually discarding, attire associated with an affair when it ended, I kept jewelry.To commemorate my secret puppet shadow's retirement I sold it all, an amount which totaled over $50,000, a surprise considering jewelry retail markup. I split it and gave it anonymously to a church poor box and the Salvation Army. I struggled with Edward's but in a true act of contrition threw his in. I only saved the little gold frog, a memento to remind me, what was, was, as sometimes, I think it was all a puppet shadow dream.Who am I? It's not the question I ask anymore. I ask, who was I? That’s what I sought to answer as I wrote my personal conundrum saga.Don't judge me harshly. I lived one. And then i it dawned on me. i dont know if its because i have walked in the path of jesus and forgiveness is my shit now or if its just because i love her to fucking much, because i thought to myself ' so what if we have a baby, my dad said if i wanted to then i could work with him in the bank when i hit 18. so i would have a steady job, and i love this girl to much to be mad at her' i got up wiped my tears and walked in the living room and kissed cookie on the lips, she smiled and then said"im trying to sleep, quit kissing me with those big sexy lips" she said while smiling."cookie, we need to talk about something. so be serious please." hearing that she sat up and looked at me."whats wrong boo, is everything ok?" why didnt you tell me that your not on birth control?" i asked with a stern look on my face."oh. umm.. you found out?" she said looking like she was going to cry"your damn right i found out. how could you let me cum inside of you when your not on birth control? you know.
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